Top ↑ | Archive

perks-of-being-chinese:

get the fries stop the cries

(via orgasmic-humor)

notallwugs:

Two scientists walk into a bar:

"I’ll have an H2O."

"I’ll have an H2O, too."

The bartender gives them both water because he is able to distinguish the boundary tones that dictate the grammatical function of homonyms in coda position as well as pragmatic context.

(via orgasmic-humor)

whiteboyfriend:

goodbye children

whiteboyfriend:

goodbye children

(via orgasmic-humor)

iggyazaleasss:

sitting in math like

image

(via orgasmic-humor)

modestmgmtofficial:

everything’s so funny when u use the wrong measurement:

  • 5 gallons of homework
  • mouthful of lint
  • 20 degrees of facial oil
  • 7 pints of china
  • handful of fergi
  • 60 mph of dad

(via orgasmic-humor)

cybertwinks:

the only people who ever call me pretty are either old or online

(via orgasmic-humor)

sschol:

this is from spy kids

(via orgasmic-humor)

zygoats:

"if feminists want equality does this mean we can punch women now?"
go ahead chicken shit punch me in the fucking face. i will shove your entire upper body into your own ass and make you fuck yourself from the inside out

(via orgasmic-humor)